e_juliana: (wtf - shirley)
Me: What are you watching?

M: Some game show. Meatloaf's hosting, Flock of Seagulls and Toto are playing. note: I heard "Tool" the first time, which made it even more surreal

Me: Um. I have to go over here now.


Seriously, some conversations should never happen at 7 in the morning, or at least pre-coffee.
e_juliana: (finding the truth)
Free Will Cancer Horoscope for week of March 30, 2006

Watch out for fake pizza-delivery drivers who're actually trying to issue you a subpoena. Be careful you don't see a blood red sky at dusk, in case it's a bad omen predicting the outbreak of tribulations. Beware of the possibility that a large bird carrying a turtle to its nest accidentally drops its prey on your head from a great height. APRIL FOOL! The truth is, my fellow Cancerian, this should be one of the most worry-free weeks in the history of your life. You're welcome, of course, to dream up a host of scary fantasies if you find that entertaining, but I can practically guarantee that they'll all be illusory.


Heh. It is the Cancerian norm to worry. I can't guarantee I won't, but I will try not to....
e_juliana: (deadly woobie)
(courtesy of [livejournal.com profile] alexlucard

Archie vs. The Punisher. I missed this when it was first issued. It's all here, in its crackheadedly wrong glory.

Wow.

Woah.

Mar. 9th, 2006 02:35 pm
e_juliana: (fractal)
We might be getting snow soon. Probably not in the lower parts of the city, but still. Cool. (How FUCKING weird is that that I'm thinking snowfall in March is cool?? Very weird, I tell you what. Normally I'd be all "Oh, look. More snow. Snowsnowsnowsnowsnowsnow. So tired of snow.")


Also, for your daily surrealism, The Muppet Matrix. A little disturbing, yet funny.



ION, this full-on body pain can stop any. time. now. I feel like I've been beaten with a sack full of oranges. Aleve is not helping. May have to break out the Perc when I get home. I'm obviously getting sick, again. Grumble.



I need an "Ow" icon. Also a "dumbass" (referring to me) icon. Alsoalso a "friends" icon (not the show).

Since I'm clearly not going out tonight, I guess I can play with those. Or search for some. Or, you know, I could sleep. That might be a good idea.
e_juliana: (dance like no one is watching)
Z sent me this, and I felt the immediate need to share (as did [livejournal.com profile] serenada, great minds and all that):

Panda Kindergarten! (video with sound) Baby pandas sliding and hugging and learning social skills! Eeee!

::ded from the cute::
e_juliana: (comedy sheep!)
I'm wearing one of my favorite skirts today - a grey skirt that hits mid-thigh. It shows off my legs, but isn't slutty. It did, however, get me thinking about how I love dark grey clothing even more than black. A steel-grey silk longcoat would be perfect for me (oooh, maybe in duponi), except that grey threatens to wash me out, even more than my beloved black does.

This got me thinking as to how a shade could threaten me, all "Raaaar" and "I will make you look pale and sickly, puny human!" Then my skin would go "Alors! To zee barricades! Zee melanin must be in zee feerst row! Protect zee complexion!"

And then I thought that I am, quite possibly, insane. However, it does amuse me to think of my complexion as having a French accent. I can see myself saying, "Complexion! Look more alive, please, we are going to a gala affair tonight." Complexion, lounging moodily with a glass of wine would respond, "But I am le tired. Oh, very well, we shall look pretty, but I weel pout ze entire time."

Yes, most definitely insane.
e_juliana: (happyhappyjoyjoy)
Thanks to the triple-punch of massive dentistry, truck accidents, and the IRS, we're broke. Very broke, and have been for almost 2 months now. I had to scrap plans to take vocal classes, we're not going on any trips any time soon (we still haven't gone on honeymoon), we're not producing any shows - it's not as bad as it could be, obviously. We're not in danger of eviction (although Maruchan Ramen has been a household staple for a while). It's still not been comfy.

So, when the Guthrie announced a Directing Master Class with Joe Dowling, I looked at the price tag, whimpered, and hoped that the class would be repeated whenever we had some extra money. Zach and his mother had different plans, and presented me with a very early birthday present - the money for the class.

It's possibly the most perfect present ever. It's exactly what I wanted and needed right now. Class size is very limited, so I might not get in, but that doesn't matter as much as the fact that I have such wonderful people in my life. I cried when I saw the check.

Just perfect.



IOW - The Manolo, he is very wise:

This, it is one of the things the Manolo he loves about the blogging, the community of the peoples who can together solve the problems, or at least talk the problems into the the ground.

Comics.

Apr. 21st, 2004 08:50 am
e_juliana: (Default)
If you're not reading Doonesbury lately, you might want to.

Also? Get Fuzzy has a few things to say.


I wonder if Darby Conley and Gary Trudeau are coordinating this. Conley's a little further along in his storyline, but it's still possible....

Snerk.

Apr. 6th, 2004 11:49 pm
e_juliana: (b&w)
Spam Mail Poetry:


Indeed, tea party of mirror host about labyrinth.mirrors remain rascally. For example, mirror from indicates that paycheck defined by require assistance from globule around.

If defendant beyond throw at near fundraiser, then defined by boy gets stinking drunk. But they need to remember how carelessly from squid procrastinates.
e_juliana: (drink)
Following is a list of the supporting roles for a new Warner Brothers movie, "Dramarama". It's basically "Bring It On" set in a drama club. It looks sooooo cheesy.

(Note: I mock, but if I had seen this 10 years ago? I would have been all over this like white on rice.)

Give me a D! )

Lord. Butch dykey goth chicks?? Wow.....
e_juliana: (tease)
Firstly, a poem written by my friend Steve, who mans the stage door at the Guthrie:


Twas the night before Christmas and the show had just ended,
cast and crew in the dram with a cocktail well blended.

Barbara Ehlen was helping a patron into her wrap,
as Rick Holcomb gathered up all the lost and found crap.

Trisha Kirk was still here, trying to think of a way,
to explain to the actors about the midnight matinee.

And me, all alone, at stage door in the dark,
just one more quick e-mail telling Santa where not to park.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
that I thanked my bright stars I was born with a strong bladder.

Well I flew up the stairs and I burst through the door,
then I slipped on some ice, bounced my head off the floor.

I awoke rather dazed, all confused, seeing stars,
it felt just like college after a night at the bars.

When, who to my wondering eye did appear?
On an Arctic Cat snowmobile, it was William Shakespeare!

"Alas," said old Bill, "Get thee up off thy bum,
pr’thee boy do get up, there is work to be done."

"For now is the winter our discontent,"
So I leapt to the sled and we proceeded hell-bent.

"Now Yorick, now Viola, now Hotspur, and Olivia,
On Hamlet, on Gloucester, on Falstaff and Calphurnia.

As he shouted each name, each bold invocation,
each character would appear, Flesh and blood at their station.

Willy Loman was there, as were Nora and Torvald,
Antigone took her place right on cue when Will called.

Malvolio, cross gartered, in his stockings of yella,
and a streetcar pulled up when Bill shouted out Stella!

Til at last there we stood, perhaps ten thousand or more,
all called forth by the Bard, yet not quite sure what for.

"Gentle Friends," Shakespeare said as he lifted his hand.
"I have brought you all here to wipe a blight from the land"

"Tis an insult to all of us born of emotion,
who have toiled with love at our craft, with devotion.

This insidious threat born of greed and derision, this
plague to our souls called reality television."

"This mindless affront without value or a worth,
thinks a kick to the groin the very pinnacle of mirth.

Alright, I agree, the groin shot is a funny old bit,
but it shouldn’t be allowed to overshadow true wit."

"Entertainment should elevate, encourage the spirit to soar,
not wallow in the filth, people this demands War!"

A mighty cheer filled the air as characters shouted out to agree,
and I was honored to think they included little old me.

Our battle will be fought in the schools, in each class,
Lady Macbeth volunteered to kick Paris Hilton’s talentless ass.

Old Prospero stepped up sturdy ax handle in hand,
"Just watch how I vote them off my fair island."

As each character marched off, their mission strong in their heart,
I asked old Shakespeare what I could do as my part.

"My dear friend" William said his eyes filled with delight
"If you work in the arts, you are leading the fight."

Then he wished me the best, and the same to you all,
and as he started his sled he let out one last call.

"So continue your work, bring them drama and cheer,
happy holidays to all and a joyous new year!



And a quiz.....

I am the Fallen.... )
e_juliana: (you rang?)
Yes, mass email, but I'm easily amused today....

Subject: Fw: Canada, eh?

These questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website and obviously the answers came from a fellow Canuck.

Q: I have never seen it warm in Canada on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only four thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)
A: So it’s true what they say about Swedes.

Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
A: Let's not touch this one.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North . . . oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is.... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (France)
A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: Can you tell me the regions on British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.

Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada?(USA)
A: Only at Thanksgiving.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter-gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Canada who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: All Canadian rattlesnakes are perfectly harmless, and can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent - eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

Q: I was in Canada in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Surrey, BC. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.
e_juliana: (Default)
Just how much I adore In Passing....

"There are so many people working on solving small problems. I figure if we all worked together to solve a big one, the little ones would just fall into place."

"And I still think it's ridiculous."

"I'm not talking about defeating entropy, I'm talking about making it our bitch."

--Two guys in line for Invertigo at Great America



Cut for Buffy finale spoilers... )

Edited to cut. Der.

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