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Two steps forward, one step back, and assorted randomness/brain dump.
I thought I was all the way back from my head injury. Changed a little, of course, but fully functional again. The headaches had almost completely subsided, I was much more on my game, everything seemed to be clicking along...
Yeah. The headaches are back. I'm losing words again. Fnargh. Doc says this is normal and expected, and she understands that I'm worried, but since the CT scan and the bloodwork showed nothing unusual and I've been under a lot of stress recently, she's not concerned about this backslide. Since I trust her implicitly, I'm not concerned either. I reserve the right to be frustrated, however, and plan on exercising that right a lot once I have time.
Tech is going fantastically, actually. Even though the TD has gone AWOL after he built a platform wrong, I'm really happy with where things are. I hope this keeps up.
Shallow fashion details: I have the opening of Richard III on Friday and Z's birthday party on Saturday, both of which are prime dressing events for yours truly. I had originally planned on wearing this dress to the opening (after I got it back from the tailor's, as I am no longer that freaky-skinny and I had to have the bodice let out in order to avoid bisecting my boobs), but it doesn't quite fit with the the show or seem very Shakespearian. So I think I'll wear that one on Saturday, and a slinky maroon velvet column dress with a black velvet cape on Friday. The velvet seems much more apropos for a show about everyone being murdered. There will, of course, be pictures of outfits.
In the realm of hard learning experiences, I offer two personal examples:
1. This job has given me a lot of practice at being around conflict and dealing with it. My boss is not the most patient of women, and I often overhear loud and heated conversations in which errors discussed at length and declared unacceptable. Other times, I'm the one she vents to. So, I'm better at managing my reaction to conflict and anger. This is good, even if the circumstances are not.
2. I think I've become better at setting my boundaries and staying there. My instinct is to bend over backwards and give in and not say anything that would upset someone (until, of course, the inevitable blow-up). Now, I think, I'm better at speaking up earlier and in a non-confrontational manner, and also at saying "these are my boundaries, this is what I need".
I still need to be better at cultivating friendships. I often feel that that will take away time from something else - running, rehearsal, or sleep. I need to make time.
I gave in and purchased eye cream that promises to reduce puffiness and the dark circles underneath my eyes. Normally, I'm a fan of treating the cause and not the symptom - when I started gaining weight back and feeling bloaty, I drastically cut my alcohol consumption. When I started feeling awful every day at work, I stopped staying out and drinking until 1 a.m. every night. Due to all of this, my life is now as ascetic as I can stand, and there's no way I can get as much sleep as my body demands or reduce the amount of stress I live under without giving up theater. So, I embrace the eye cream and hug it to my puffy eyelids. Mmmm, eye cream.
One of the reasons I (usually) love tech week - I lose weight. I do eat, but I'm so energized and up and focused that I tend to drop a pound or two. Now, if I could just get it to stay away, I'd be golden.
Party on Saturday! Yay!!
Yeah. The headaches are back. I'm losing words again. Fnargh. Doc says this is normal and expected, and she understands that I'm worried, but since the CT scan and the bloodwork showed nothing unusual and I've been under a lot of stress recently, she's not concerned about this backslide. Since I trust her implicitly, I'm not concerned either. I reserve the right to be frustrated, however, and plan on exercising that right a lot once I have time.
Tech is going fantastically, actually. Even though the TD has gone AWOL after he built a platform wrong, I'm really happy with where things are. I hope this keeps up.
Shallow fashion details: I have the opening of Richard III on Friday and Z's birthday party on Saturday, both of which are prime dressing events for yours truly. I had originally planned on wearing this dress to the opening (after I got it back from the tailor's, as I am no longer that freaky-skinny and I had to have the bodice let out in order to avoid bisecting my boobs), but it doesn't quite fit with the the show or seem very Shakespearian. So I think I'll wear that one on Saturday, and a slinky maroon velvet column dress with a black velvet cape on Friday. The velvet seems much more apropos for a show about everyone being murdered. There will, of course, be pictures of outfits.
In the realm of hard learning experiences, I offer two personal examples:
1. This job has given me a lot of practice at being around conflict and dealing with it. My boss is not the most patient of women, and I often overhear loud and heated conversations in which errors discussed at length and declared unacceptable. Other times, I'm the one she vents to. So, I'm better at managing my reaction to conflict and anger. This is good, even if the circumstances are not.
2. I think I've become better at setting my boundaries and staying there. My instinct is to bend over backwards and give in and not say anything that would upset someone (until, of course, the inevitable blow-up). Now, I think, I'm better at speaking up earlier and in a non-confrontational manner, and also at saying "these are my boundaries, this is what I need".
I still need to be better at cultivating friendships. I often feel that that will take away time from something else - running, rehearsal, or sleep. I need to make time.
I gave in and purchased eye cream that promises to reduce puffiness and the dark circles underneath my eyes. Normally, I'm a fan of treating the cause and not the symptom - when I started gaining weight back and feeling bloaty, I drastically cut my alcohol consumption. When I started feeling awful every day at work, I stopped staying out and drinking until 1 a.m. every night. Due to all of this, my life is now as ascetic as I can stand, and there's no way I can get as much sleep as my body demands or reduce the amount of stress I live under without giving up theater. So, I embrace the eye cream and hug it to my puffy eyelids. Mmmm, eye cream.
One of the reasons I (usually) love tech week - I lose weight. I do eat, but I'm so energized and up and focused that I tend to drop a pound or two. Now, if I could just get it to stay away, I'd be golden.
Party on Saturday! Yay!!
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